Madeleine Eames

- Psychotherapist
- Mindfulness Teacher

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Simple ways to deal with worry

 

 

The other day I was worried about something to do with one of my kids- they do that to you. Worry had been sitting in the back of my mind like a dirty corner of the room… gnawing at me to clean up. So, as I noticed the unease in my body and my mind’s tendency to look for things to worry about, I faced it head on.

 

As I examined the thoughts causing the unease, and looked at the root cause (wanting my kids to live happy, healthy lives)… I saw that the worry was absolutely, completely unfounded in this moment. There was no evidence that supported my fear. Poof!

 

That is not to say that what you worry about will never happen, but it will never happen as you planned it. And, the chances of it happening are usually pretty darn slim.

 

It made me wonder about these fearful thoughts that seem to float around looking for someone to give them a cozy home and make them real. They’re not new, they are all repetitive stories that get told again and again. I see the consequences of their existence in my office all the time in the form of ingrained beliefs. Beliefs are just thoughts we think over and over again. They set the stage for how our lives play out.

 

Steps to address worry and stop it in it’s tracks:

  •  Breathe. Worry tenses and contracts the body. It’s very difficult to have a worried mind in a calm body. Don’t give up… practice breathing in for a count of 4 and out for 6, or work up to this. This is essential.
  • Look at the actual fear. For example, “I am worried that….”.
  • Is this true? What is the actual evidence for it right now?
  • An interesting note is this: Look at where it came from. Is it something in you you’re afraid of or avoiding? Is it a belief you grew up with, or more commonly, something in your past you are resisting?

 

Worry exists in the mind and shows up in the body. Try feeling your feet, ground down into the earth. Or better yet, lie down outside and look up. Either way, connect with the earth to get out of your head. Breathe in what is happening right now and notice that worry is not here, right now, in the room. Space.

 

Fear is a part of life, but it doesn’t have to rule. Make friends with it, shake hands, acknowledge it and thank it for it’s concern. It’s here for the ride but let it know under no circumstances is it taking the drivers seat. It can sit in the back seat voicing it’s concerns which you will hear but not necessarily listen to.

 

Try it. Don’t waste another moment. [tweetthis]Usually, when we get out of the thinking mind, the factory of all fear, we are in fact OK.[/tweetthis]

 

Let me know in the comments below or on our Just Breathe facebook page how you are kicking worry to the back seat. Have a great week,

Madeleine

 

 

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