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Madeleine Eames

- Psychotherapist
- Mindfulness Teacher

Discovering Your Aliveness at Midlife


 

What is alive within you, waiting to be uncovered, nourished and explored?

This is a question that often arrives for women at midlife, when the end of this journey is just over the mountain, and we are halfway there if we are lucky. 

It is often a time, as well, where our training to look outside of ourselves for who we are, our identity, either rises in a panicky, searching way, or allows us to look within, and uncover the gold that lies right here just under our nose. 

True freedom and liberation lies there too, if we know what to look for. It can also be sadly equated with “feeling good”, looking good and being good. 

The result of that route is simply another layer of conditioning, another mask, more guilt and more false selves. 

The true beauty and aliveness is revealed as we start to see, notice and know all the ways that we have contorted ourselves out of our own aliveness, our authenticity. 

Everything else is fixing the same box you live in, decorating the walls and making it more comfy. 

But you are still living in a box looking out the window. 

True aliveness is a switch from managing… managing symptoms, managing your body, managing anxiety, managing pain, managing people, managing your life.. to living your life.  

If you are simply “managing”, you are surviving, living “lite”. 

Just keeping your head above water, avoiding criticism, avoiding conflict, trying to “get it right”, live right, eat healthy, please others, exercise, read, all a long list of “shoulds”. 

What would life be like without any “shoulds”? 

Yes, we have to buy groceries, eat and go to the toilet. But what are all the shoulds you worry about doing simply out of obligation, or to avoid something. An emotion, criticism, being judged, feeling guilty?

You see, when you start to cut through the layers of illusion about who you truly are, your aliveness starts to grow. 

That is what you might not know yet. 

But as women we are so well trained from a young age to look outside to see what is acceptable, approved of and liked, that we don’t realize….

Your aliveness has never been done before.

You, in this incarnation, has never been alive before. 

So you won’t find you out there. 

That is the first secret truth about finding your aliveness, your true self and purpose at midlife.

You are not out there. You are in here.  

Stay tuned. Next we shine light on the aliveness in our nervous system states.

To discovering your aliveness,

Madeleine

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