Madeleine Eames

- Psychotherapist
- Mindfulness Teacher

Share on facebook
Share on twitter
Share on email
Share on linkedin

When What you Accept, Persists





I think the curious thing is that we often get stuck in the first part of this quote… sometimes that is enough, and it is a necessary step. However, where mindfulness can be grossly misunderstood is when we pause, we observe, we notice our thoughts without engaging with them…. and we think we don’t have the right to action.  Yes, mindfulness is acceptance of the present moment as it is, no denial, with all it’s pain and joy and discomfort and beauty. It does mean including what may have been left out, avoided or resisted, but still exists. But what if what we are accepting persists… does it mean to go back to resistance? No, it’s a starting point. You’re at the gate. Let me help clear this up …..


Mindfulness does not mean allowing what is not healthy or good for ourselves. We don’t allow ourselves to be doormats, or treat ourselves unfairly.  It can be pivotal in coming to accept with full clarity the impact of the situation, but from here we can choose how to respond, as opposed to react.  When we slow down the fight-or-flight knee-jerk reaction, we can respond in a way that is respectful of ourselves and others, from a place of love. Sometimes taking action in expressing feelings clearly is all that is needed. As we know, as much as we try we can’t seem to control other people! By the way, you may notice that most situations actually require no response.


A few good questions to ask yourself if the water gets muddy…….

What feelings does this situation bring up for me?  Be super clear…

Is this my responsibility or someone else’s? Takin’ on others again… lighten your load dear 🙂

How can I respond to this from a place of Love? Can’t go wrong there…

Do I need to sit with this a bit longer until it’s clear?

What do I really long for here? Is that an old unmet need??


Still clear as mud? Remember, we’re all human and there’s no manual for that.  All we can do is try with good intentions, know that your feelings are important and let go of the outcome.  That, we cannot control. Got a comment? Feel free to share it on Facebook..  Lovely week everyone.


“We can never make peace in the outer world until we make peace with ourselves”

Dalai Lama


Madeleine's Most Recent Posts

The Dark Night of the Soul

When I awoke this morning the sun was streaming in my window at our small cabin. Outside, the leaves were gently falling from the giant chestnut tree, wave were lapping at the shore and I could see a slight breeze was blowing.  This time of year is magical for me.

Read More »

Moving Through the Stuck Places

You were never meant to get it right. Like there is a right to get. You are created to be here, to live and breathe here, to love and be loved, to suffer and experience joy. And to let go of all you have learned that you should be. What

Read More »

A New Kind of Anger

Most of the women I work with who are stuck in people-pleasing mode, have difficulty expressing, or even locating the emotion of anger.  There is a link. A very important one.  Seeing as anger is a life-force energy designed to protect and alert the system that something is wrong, not

Read More »

How Do You Age Gracefully When You’re So Angry?

You don’t, is the short answer.  First of all, the phrase “aging gracefully” just pisses me off. Why? Because it sends a message that women are supposed to age in smooth, flowing, ballet dancer style.  Not the stop-and-start, messy, sometimes scary and angry and often hilarious way we live.  Oh

Read More »

Subscribe For Peaceful Insights

Top Posts

Want To Know The Truth About Anxiety?

Madeleine’s Archived Posts